Archive | October 2012

“Just write about it, any thing your feeling” Advice from ChefBlaze

Children having to accept and cope with death

Young adult afraid to commit because they surpassed their expiration date by years  and they fear that any day now they will cease to exist

Gay men exiled from their families, locked out of their churches and condemned to hell

Straight men shunned from their communities

Women murdered bloody bodies left cold on their bed room floor for their children to find

I am that child. I am that young adult, I am that women, I may not be a gay or straight man but we are on the same side of discrimination, stigma, hate, fear, and discuss.  I am an HIV warrior, survivor, advocate, educator, and example.

I live my life out loud. People tell me that no one needs to know my HIV status at the first hello but I honestly feel that the more I talk about it the better. If I can get through the fake people and move on to the ones who accept me as I am I can spend my time where it counts. I just decided right now that I dont have time for ignorance. If a person is misinformed about the facts surrounding HIV then I vow to educate them as long as they are accepting and receptive of the message that I have to share with them.

I promised a friend of mines that I would write when ever the feeling hits me. I have no idea where these thought came from but I feel good about the fact that I sat down and let it all out, Thanks for the advice ChefBlaze!

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2020 Leading Womens Society

I’m very proud of myself and yet I feel like I haven’t done enough to deserve that pride. On Oct 18th I jumped on a plane and flew out to Atlanta Georgia where I met about 35 women who share in my passion for an AIDS free world. I was accepted as on of the 20 women that Sister Love chose to honor for living with HIV for 20 years or longer. I was accepted with open arms into the 2020 Leading Women’s Society class of 2012! The red carpet event was amazing. It started with a limo ride from The Twelve (the hotel that would be my home for the weekend). The 19 other women and I were met at the start of the red carpet by our escorts who helped us out of the limo and stood with us as we waited to make our entrance. Immediately after entering the event space we were interview one by one and had our photos taken just like the stars at a fancy Hollywood award ceremony.

 

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The escorts then walked us to the very front of the dinner space where we were to sit and enjoy the rest of the night. Dinner started with a delicious mixed green salad followed by chicken with a garlic and olive sauce and roasted vegetables. The food was very good but the desert was even better! Chocolate cake with a rich fudge center drizzled with chocolate syrup.Image

As we ate our desert the award ceremony began. They called us up to the stage where we received our awards and had the chance to make an acceptance speech with our name and picture display on 2 giant screens. I felt like a super star!

There was fantastic entertainment. a young women sang ‘Satellites’ one of my favorite songs by Beyonce and a praise dance team, Chosen Vessels did a lovely dance routine that ended with them bring each of the 2020 LWS inductees to the front of the room. We were each given a white feather as a symbol to show that we were ready to fly. It was amazing to look to my left and my right and see all those beautiful women dressed to the nines. We were all connected by HIV a virus that no one wants to claim, no one wants to be associated with, but on that night I was proud! Proud of my sisters and the hard work they’ve done, proud of the strength in the room, proud of the escorts who held our hands as we sashayed down that red carpet, and last but not least I was proud of myself for living my Positively Beautiful life with compassion and love for all. I cant wait until I feel like my work is something I can be proud of.

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There was a women in Atlanta who taught us about how to make something from nothing. She made quilts from old clothes that she sold for up to $300. She taught me a lot! I have many creative talents and I enjoy making things. There is no reason why I cant do what I enjoy and make a living from it. I left Atlanta with my creative hat on. The Positively Beautiful Fashion Show will be a success sooner rather then later!

This entry was posted on October 29, 2012. 1 Comment

Fashion Model, Diva, Beauty Queen, HIV positive

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I have heard many people say “you can be any thing you want to be if you pot your mind to it” I never believed in that saying because I couldn’t be HIV negative no matter how hard I tried. I had to learn how to deal with the cards that god dealt me and still win the game.

Next month I’m going to compete in The Ethnic World Beauty Pageant  www.ethnicworldpageants.com.

Ive been working on the question and answer section trying to word my answers in a way that show the judges who I am. I’m happy with the work Ive done so far but I totally forgot about the fact that I need CLOTHES!!!! what am I going to wear? It has to be perfect but I don’t even know what that is lol HELP!!!!!!! I’m open for suggestion on where to go and who to call. I’m also looking for friends to come be apart of the audience and support my as I go for the crown. I need your support! please feel free to e-mail me for more information